I’d just sat down to a nice cup of coffee.

Two sugar sachets are on the saucer. The teaspoon looks rusty and dirty from too many dishwasher washes. Never mind, the coffee looks good, and it’s a beautiful day here on Mumbles seafront.

I take my first sip, and then it begins.

“Hello, Brian, can you hear me……I’m on the mobile……can you hear me, Brian?”

Bit of a pause.

“Brian, can you……what?…….what did you say, Brian?”

Longer pause.

“I’m ringing to find out if…….Brian, are you still there?”

Bit of a pause.

“OK, I’m waving now. Can you see me?”

Pause

“Well, I’m waving. Hold on, I’ll get Margaret to wave.”

Margaret starts to wave her hand.

“Can you see us?”

Pause

“Well, I can’t understand it; we’re both waving. Are you there, Brian? Can you hear me?”

Pause

“Yes, I was ringing to find out if it was working?”

Pause

“No, I said, I was ringing…….Brian, can you hear me? Perhaps you can’t hear what I’m saying?”

Pause.

“OK, I’ll get Margaret to wave again. Hold on.”

Margaret waves again, and a small girl passing by, licking an ice cream cone, waves back at her.

“Can you see her waving, Brian? I’m waving now as well. Can you see us?”

Pause.

“No, I’ve been to the Opticians. My eyes are OK. I wasn’t ringing about that; I was ringing about the……”

Longer pause.

“No, my eyes are fine. They said I could continue with the glasses I’ve had for the last… hello…Brian, can you hear me? Are you still there, Brian?”

He looks at the phone.

“I think he’s gone, Margaret.”

He puts the phone back to his ear.

“Brian, are you still there?”

By this time, I had gulped my coffee down, wanting to get away, but then he looked at the phone again, and this time he closed it up, since it was one of those clam-style phones. I thought about getting another coffee and maybe a cake to continue my people-watching, but then his phone rang.

“Hello…Brian, is that you? Can you hear me?”

Not wanting to find out what he wanted to know was working; Toby and I made a rapid departure.

We enjoyed a lovely, quiet walk home along the beach without the sound of any mobile phones going off.

Toby on the beach

Have you ever overheard a one-sided conversation? What was it about?

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73 responses to “How To Spend A Restful Few Minutes Over A Cup Of Coffee”

  1. C.M. Blackwood avatar
    C.M. Blackwood

    That was laugh-out-loud funny. And I love little Toby. Kinda reminds me of my Mattie. :)

    1. Hugh's Views and News avatar

      Thank you. He’s even written a few posts on my blog while I’ve left the computer on and gone out!

      1. C.M. Blackwood avatar
        C.M. Blackwood

        Awww! Smart little Toby. ;)

  2. Cathy avatar

    Shame about the coffee but it looks like you and Toby had a lovely peaceful walk :-)

    1. Hugh's Views and News avatar

      It was wonderful, Cathy. We’ve settled in a very nice part of Wales.

  3. Jane Dougherty avatar

    They’re infuriating, aren’t they. The ones I like to earwig on are the loud-mouthed hysterics who conduct a relationship breakdown in the middle of the street under my window. I have been known to lean out and join in…

    1. Hugh's Views and News avatar

      You should record one, Jane. Would make very interesting reading.

      1. Jane Dougherty avatar

        It makes you realise how eventful some people’s lives are :)

        1. Hugh's Views and News avatar

          True, and I guess it’s a useful tool for us writers in that we can weave these conversations into our writing.

          1. Jane Dougherty avatar

            Some of them would certainly provide material for police thrillers.

            1. Hugh's Views and News avatar

              And Horror movies 👹

  4. John W. Howell avatar

    I heard one of these this morning and had to get away.

    1. Hugh's Views and News avatar

      Did you catch what it was about?

      1. John W. Howell avatar

        Oh yes. It was about a woman telling someone about her vaginal web surgery and how it took eight years for the doctors to find out it wasn’t done right. I ran away before she decided to show rather than tell.

        1. Hugh's Views and News avatar

          I’m glad you ran, John. My goodness, what a post that would have been, especially if it was one of those photo prompts you write about.

          1. John W. Howell avatar

            Ha ha ha. (“Excuse me could you show me what you are talking about?”) OOOF

  5. mandibelle16 avatar
    mandibelle16

    Lovely story. I enjoyed it!

    1. Hugh's Views and News avatar

      Good to hear. Let’s hope I pick up some more gems like this.

  6. treerabold avatar

    Nothing like a cell phone to interrupt a peaceful moment

    1. Hugh's Views and News avatar

      Very true. Yet, we can’t seem to live without them.

  7. Smorgasbord - Variety is the Spice of Life. avatar

    Ah bless your heart for just walking away Hugh.. I would have dunked his phone in his coffee and probably added a piece of victoria sponge to boot!!!! hugs

    1. Hugh's Views and News avatar

      I was tempted, Sally, but I feared Margaret would have come running after me. 😀

  8. Teagan Geneviene avatar

    Oh gosh… Toby at least seems to be having a fun day. Mega hugs!

    1. Hugh's Views and News avatar

      He is, Teagan. In fact, we all are, especially with such beautiful weather.

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