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When Death Comes Quickly #flashfiction

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Hugh W. Roberts

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July 22, 2021, prompt: In 99 words (no more, no less), write a story about a hometown. It can be your hometown or a fictional one. Who is there? When is it set? What is happening? Go where the prompt leads!

When Death Comes Quickly – by Hugh W. Roberts

Finding herself abandoned by her parents, Annabelle settled down for the night. This was the first time she’d be alone in her hometown, and it was dark, damp and smelly.

Squeezing into a tiny corner, she sobbed. Why had her parents decided now was the time to leave their hometown without her? She was too vulnerable to be left alone.

It was a bright light that woke her before she and her hometown were covered in a minty mouthwash that instantly killed them.

Not even a germ was safe when its hometown was the mouth of a human being.

***

Written for the 99-word flash fiction challenge hosted by Charli Mills at the Carrot Ranch. Click here to join in.

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35 responses to “When Death Comes Quickly #flashfiction”

  1. Did You Miss Any Of These? Monthly Round-Up – August 2021 – Hugh's Views & News   avatar
    Did You Miss Any Of These? Monthly Round-Up – August 2021 – Hugh's Views & News  

    […] When Death Comes Quickly #flashfiction […]

    Reply
  2. My Hometown « Carrot Ranch Literary Community avatar
    My Hometown « Carrot Ranch Literary Community

    […] When Death Comes Quickly by Hugh W. Roberts […]

    Reply
  3. dgkaye avatar
    dgkaye

    Loved it, right down to the last drop a la Hugh Roberts. <3

    Reply
    1. Hugh W. Roberts avatar
      Hugh W. Roberts

      Thanks, Debby. This one has been hanging around in my archives for a long time. Now seemed the right time to let it lose on you all.

      Reply
      1. dgkaye avatar
        dgkaye

        Yes, it was perfectly preserved :)

        Reply
  4. Rebecca Glaessner Author avatar
    Rebecca Glaessner Author

    What a twist Hugh! Loved it. Great take on the prompt.

    Reply
    1. Hugh W. Roberts avatar
      Hugh W. Roberts

      Thank you, Rebecca. Glad you enjoyed it. I wrote this piece last year but never published it. ‘Hometown’ seemed the perfect prompt for me to release it.

      Reply
  5. Liesbet @ Roaming About avatar
    Liesbet @ Roaming About

    Haha! I love these twisty Hugh stories!

    Reply
    1. Hugh W. Roberts avatar
      Hugh W. Roberts

      I’m glad to hear you say so, Liesbet.

      Reply
  6. Book Club Mom avatar
    Book Club Mom

    Oh my – what an original perspective!

    Reply
    1. Hugh W. Roberts avatar
      Hugh W. Roberts

      Thank you, Barbara. I like thinking ‘out of the box.’

      Reply
  7. JT Twissel avatar
    JT Twissel

    Your imagination is amazing!

    Reply
    1. Hugh W. Roberts avatar
      Hugh W. Roberts

      Thank you. When I allow it to run wild, it goes way beyond being wild.

      Reply
  8. Erika avatar
    Erika

    OMG, this is awesome!! Amazing idea, Hugh 😄

    Reply
    1. Hugh W. Roberts avatar
      Hugh W. Roberts

      Thanks, Erika. I’ve been waiting to use this piece of flash for ages. Finally, the time came.

      Reply
      1. Erika avatar
        Erika

        Thus, you wrote it in wise foresight. That’s even cooler!

        Reply
        1. Hugh W. Roberts avatar
          Hugh W. Roberts

          Thank you.

          Reply
          1. Erika avatar
            Erika

            You are very welcome, Hugh 😊

            Reply
  9. Terri Webster Schrandt avatar
    Terri Webster Schrandt

    Hahahahaha! I was waiting for the twist….I could feel it coming…thinking of a rat or bug in a cellar…nope! You did it again, Hugh, I will giggle when I brush my teeth ;)

    Reply
    1. Hugh W. Roberts avatar
      Hugh W. Roberts

      Glad you didn’t guess the twist, Terri, but you were on the right path.

      Reply
  10. Cathy avatar
    Cathy

    Another surprise ending!

    Reply
    1. Hugh W. Roberts avatar
      Hugh W. Roberts

      Thanks, Cathy. Glad you enjoyed it.

      Reply
  11. Aimer Boyz avatar
    Aimer Boyz

    Amazing! Now, I’m feeling bad for a germ!

    Reply
    1. Hugh W. Roberts avatar
      Hugh W. Roberts

      Thank you. I bet they don’t feel bad for you. Had I not given this particular germ a name, I wonder how you would have felt?

      Reply
      1. Aimer Boyz avatar
        Aimer Boyz

        It wasn’t so much the name as the poor thing being abandoned by her parents :)

        Reply
  12. philosophermouseofthehedge avatar
    philosophermouseofthehedge

    Made me giggle!

    Reply
    1. Hugh W. Roberts avatar
      Hugh W. Roberts

      Giggle? Not want to gargle?

      Reply
      1. philosophermouseofthehedge avatar
        philosophermouseofthehedge

        So glad you picked up on that! silliness implied!

        Reply
  13. willowdot21 avatar
    willowdot21

    Well done Hugh where did that come from 💜

    Reply
    1. Hugh W. Roberts avatar
      Hugh W. Roberts

      Would you believe me if I said while cleaning my teeth the other morning, Willow?

      Reply
      1. willowdot21 avatar
        willowdot21

        Of course I would Hugh, of course I would 💜

        Reply
  14. Ritu avatar
    Ritu

    Love the twist, here, Hugh!

    Reply
    1. Hugh W. Roberts avatar
      Hugh W. Roberts

      Thanks, Ritu. Another ‘out of towner’ twist from me.

      Reply
  15. Dave Williams avatar
    Dave Williams

    I certainly didn’t expect death to come quickly in that way!

    Reply
    1. Hugh W. Roberts avatar
      Hugh W. Roberts

      Good to know, Dave. I’m pleased you never saw the twist coming.

      Reply

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