“Oh, my goodness, what are you doing?”

“Well, you did say you wanted me to help get the fluff out.”

“Yes, but not with a screwdriver. Is there anything else you can use?”

“No. Nothing to hand. Now, do you want me to remove the fluff from your belly button?”

“Yes, but I’m sure I can hear something creaking.”

“Oh, don’t worry about that. Right, here we go. Ready? A slight twist, and it should be out.”

“Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!”

“Oh, I’m so sorry. I never expected that to happen. Allow me to pick up your bum and screw it back on.”

***

The moral of the story – never insert a screwdriver into your belly button and twist because your bum will fall off!

Written in response to Charli Mills 99 word flash fiction challenge with the theme of Navel.

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57 responses to “Fluff #flashfiction”

  1. insearchofitall avatar

    Thanks for the morning giggle. I needed that. :)

    1. Hugh's Views and News avatar

      You’re welcome. I’m glad it made you laugh. 😀

  2. robbiesinspiration avatar

    Ha ha, Hugh! Reminds me of that animated movie Robots.

    1. Hugh's Views and News avatar

      Thanks, Robbie. That’s a movie I’ve not seen…yet.

  3. Chuck avatar

    Hugh,
    I want to know if you turn the screw counter-clock-wise, is this when your bumm (butt in USA) falls off? If you turned the screw clock-wise would it tighten it? My butt is sagging right now and it needs to be tightened. All help is appreciated.

    1. Hugh's Views and News avatar

      With all the crazy health & safety rules in circulation, I can’t possibly comment, Chuck. Although you may like to try clenching your buttocks in time with the noise tomato juice makes when it comes out of a carton. It’s helped me. 😀

  4. houstonphotojourney avatar

    I will keep that in mind Hugh 🙂

    1. Hugh's Views and News avatar

      Cool. I thought I better warn everyone. 😀

  5. Charli Mills avatar

    If you have to have a screw loose, not that one! Thanks for the warning and the laugh!

    1. Hugh's Views and News avatar

      Screw loose? Me? Many, Charli. 😀

  6. John W. Howell avatar

    Why are bums the first thing to fall off?

    1. Hugh's Views and News avatar

      Because it’s a very long screw. 😀

      1. John W. Howell avatar

        How do you explain what happens when one LaughsMAO? See what I mean?

        1. Hugh's Views and News avatar

          I do. Carry on Laughing. 🤣

            1. Hugh's Views and News avatar

              Don’t stay down there too long. You need to have breakfast. 😀

            2. John W. Howell avatar

              Thanks Hugh. I needed that.

  7. neelwritesblog avatar

    I was laughing over this all right. Great humour you captured here Hugh.

    1. Hugh's Views and News avatar

      Good the hear. I’ve not written much comedy, so this is great feedback.

  8. Ritu avatar

    Ouch!!! Lol!!!

  9. Teagan Geneviene avatar

    LOL… I’m speechless — and not just because of my laryngitis!

    1. Hugh's Views and News avatar

      Sorry to hear about your laryngitis, Teagan. Hope you get your voice back soon. At least you can still write, even if you can’t talk.

  10. Liesbet avatar

    Very funny story and warning. That sign is interesting, especially since I am planning to spread my grandma’s ashes somewhere, after keeping some in a necklace. I won’t do it in a National Park!

    1. Hugh's Views and News avatar

      That photo is from Charli’s website, so all credit to her, but yes, be careful.

  11. thebeasley avatar

    I’ll remember this! Good tip Hugh!

    1. Hugh's Views and News avatar

      See, I’m not just good for blogging tips. 😀

      1. thebeasley avatar

        Haha. Indeed. General life skills tips too!

  12. Dan Antion avatar

    Don’t lose the screw!

    1. Hugh's Views and News avatar

      True. Now, where did I put it? 🤔

  13. Miriam avatar

    Haha, warning heeded Hugh.

    1. Hugh's Views and News avatar

      Phew! Think of all the bottoms I’ll be saving, Miriam. 😀

      1. Miriam avatar

        Absolutely! 😊

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